SOCL Thanksgiving #2

Written by Andrew Lim, University College Cork, Participant

Prior to SOCL, I was struggling to stay committed to having a regular prayer life, and felt like I was failing God in this relationship, so I was wondering how I could recommit my life to him and what it even meant to surrender my life to Jesus. I was battling a lot of lies from the previous year of leading a cell group that I didn’t achieve what I set out to do and failed in many ways, so I was hoping that coming to the school would help me be more convicted in my walk with the Lord in the coming year. 

While I was still fearful of what the 10 days would bring and SOCL being moved online, I still believed that God prepared a way for me to turn up for the full duration as I previously wouldn’t have been able to and that He called me by name to be present. The 10 days were a time of trusting in the Lord and what He had in store for me, and it was revealed to me that I’ve been wrongly placing my worth on the work I was doing and have forgotten my first identity as His beloved child in the process of doing so. It was one that was difficult to swallow and let go but I’m thankful to God for His never-ending pursuit of me. It was also then that God called me to be more vulnerable to Him, which was difficult because I was trying to keep Him at a safe distance in my life. However, through the vulnerability and many testimonies of faith shared by others over the school, I desired more for what God wanted to do for me and thus began this ongoing process of being willing to give God more of my heart. 

Leaving this school, I want to claim the truth that God is pleased with me and not with any amount of work I do, because He calls me His beloved and allows me to find refuge in Him alone. He desires more for me than anything I can imagine. Will you allow the Lord to take you on this adventure with Him today?

Written by Rebecca Lee, SMU, Participant

I fought very hard against Jesus before SOCL and even the first few days of SOCL, I was so close to pulling out. Having a very dry season during the holidays, focusing on internship, money and other material things, I was so so far from Christ. I wrestled with all my worldly desires throughout SOCL, telling myself that I don’t want to let go of it even though I know I should, I can’t do it, it’s too hard, I don’t want this. But somehow despite all my restlessness and distractions, Jesus still managed to speak so many beautiful truths to me. He revealed His love for me. A love I found so hard to grasp and understand. A love I never thought I could experience because He was not of this world.

But through revealing my inner wounds that dated all the way back to primary school, I saw Him there with me, holding my small little hand, walking with me. He looked at me with a gaze filled with such immense love and said to me: “my child, don’t worry, you are not alone, I love you, and I will walk with you every step of the way.” Streams of tears just flowed uncontrollably. I realised that this is God revealing Himself to me, speaking to me, showing me in such a tangible way that His love for me was so great, so gentle, so overwhelming. No one in this world could ever come close to loving me the way that our lord and saviour loves me. Jesus has always loved me and will always love me. He will always hold my hand, even if I do not recognise it, even if I do not want it, and even if I push him away. Thank you Jesus for loving me in spite of my disbelief.

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